TotTP Episode 054 – Let Loose the Gays
This week Daniel and Kinky Cassie hold down the fort once again with an extremely, sexual episode. I dare you not to masturbate to this episode!
The crew first get your nipples hard by discussing their sexual journeys for the week. With stories ranging from Cassie’s kinky daddy talk, where she is literally called fat by a sexual partner to Daniel travels through the underground railroad, leading to a near boning experience of Harriet Tubman. Luckily, he escapes the clutches of her ghetto to find out that it’s never too late to back out or pull out. Sometimes, a lack of a condom protects against post-orgasm regret.
Speaking of regret, before boning that cheap hooker in your marital bed, you might want to make sure your wife didn’t buy the “Smartress.” Your wife knows you may not be faithful, but at least her mattress is. The crew discusses the perks of owning a mattress that alerts you to a possible cheating partner. While Cassie finds the idea to be intriguing and well worth the $1,800 price tag, it is probably best to realize that at the point this mattress is needed, your relationship is probably already in shambles. Daniel and Cassie take a trip down memory lane, where we discover just how many times Cassie fucked in Daniel’s bed. (Something to remember- the Smartress does not track the existence of sexual fluids, but you can always see if his sheets are stained. He may have fucked that squirter down the street).
After a brief break, Daniel and Cassie decide to help all the people on Craigslist find their mixed connections. Sometimes you spot a guy across the room (at a bookstore, restaurant, groccery store), and you just want to suck him off right there. However, their ugly, gremlin, troll-like “friend” is unintentionally cock blocking- so you post in hopes your cock-eralla will be scrolling through craigslist in search of the perfect sized mouth. But they could be possible looking for a catholic boy to get freaky with, or at least Cassie hopes they are.
My boyfriend of two years, Shane, is a self centered, douche bag who only cares about posting pictures of himself and not us. I can’t figure out who is more of an idiot him – for being in love with himself posting endless selfies – or me, for not realizing I have been the mistress to his ego the past two years?
Cassie and Daniel again offer their no bullshit advice (Because fuck your shitty advice, Abby). The discussion goes into the the role social media plays in today’s relationships, and how shitty it feels for your significant other to not show you off. Daniel has experienced both ends of the spectrum; an ex who wanted to be very public about their relationship, and an ex that didn’t want his mug on her facebook at all. Poor Daniel. In the end, it is all about balance. But here’s some advice, if you are five years married, two kids in, and his facebook status says “single”- he is just not that into you. Just sayin’
The show finishes up with a grasp for last minute show prep. Daniel revamps the ol’ game show “Match Game”, where he attempts to bring all the bachelors to the yard for Cassie, with all the reasons why Taurus’s are fuckable, and dateble. Finally, a mystery guest is introduced, TotT’s new attempt at an intern maybe (‘cause that went so well last time!)? More to come . . .
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