TotTP Episode 053 – Cussin’, Fussin’, and Doin’ Dope
This week, after a delightful live pre-show that finds Daniel rescuing Kinky Cassie from the side of the road; and breaking the bad news of the absence of The Courtney 3000, the show FINALLY begins!
To start the show, Cassie discusses her first bar hopping experience. Cheers to legal drinking! Daniel comments on how square he is for lack of legal drinking. No regrets here, he prefers cooling off in swanky Torrid dressing rooms instead, anyways. This story flows into how Daniel and Cassie cannot seem to stop stalking hot waitresses all over San Diego. Hide yo food handler card, ladies- they are coming for you! The best way to protect all waitresses . . . stop hiring cute ones! Also, don’t entertain folk who “lose” their glasses at restaurants. Looking at you, Cassie!
The show then plunges into the deep end with some serious topics. Cassie finds a thoroughly disturbing video sure to leave everyone hugging, kissing, and cuddling their dolls/action figures. The Demon child video reminds us evil does in fact exist.
Some fucked up shit is said by a five year old girl abusing her doll. The video will make you question the human race, most definitely the mother. But seriously, kids say messed up things.
Get Your Life To-fuckin’-gether!
Daniel and Cassie take on Contemporary Feminism and their whiny Social Justice Warriors – an act they could be drowned for by a herd of angry feminists. . . By they, I mean Daniel (Drowning Cassie is incredibly sexist, you misogynist pricks!). Despite the threat of backlash, our podcasters spread the knowledge by going over a list of commonly confused vocabulary words such as: “Manspreading” and “Mansplaining”. Essentially, men cannot stop shoving their dicks down everyone’s throat. The power of the penis compels you!
Daniel continues to “mansplain’’ his thoughts on privilege. In his manifesto, he declares that people need to calm down and rise above humble beginnings to make something of themselves. Can we stop making each other feel guilty for circumstances we can’t control, and instead focus on making changes for the better? Fight for your rights and all. Cassie begins to suspect a Libertarian rant coming on after Daniel rambles for a beat too long.
TotT Idol makes its first and only appearance when Daniel discovers a new rapper online sure to climb up the charts . . . with the help of Jesus of course.
Lyrical Lively Youtube Channel.
Dear Abby, I am a self-proclaimed fat girl and my boyfriend agreed I am fat. How can I get him to see I was in fact fishing for compliments, and he is an asshole for supporting my statement? Signed – Bigger Girl.
The duo decides to ignore whatever advice Abby offers, and divulge their own advice for unknown “bigger girl.” The advice is followed by an in-depth discussion on how to properly classify the body types of heavier set women, and various body types in general. Things are made easier when they make up their own scale.
Daniel and Cassie discuss their hypothetical relationship. Whatever the status of their relationship, Cassie should not expect flowers from Daniel on Valentine’s Day . . . Ever. Can’t give into the corporate greed. Unless she really wants them of course and if ladies do want them they need to be honest. Like certain exes should have been. The duo restores our faith in humanity that was lost during demon child by discussing honesty. Also, sweaty sex ass and incense makes everything better.
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